If I Was Your Girl, Meredith Russo

If I Was Your Girl by Meredith Russo
My rating: 0 of 5 stars

I'm struggling to come up with a rating for this book. Given the hype, I think I expected more emotional depth from the relationships in the book. But they all felt very surface level to me. Amanda as an individual was great, but her friendships and romantic relationship felt too shallow. Amanda and Grant's relationship felt like a plot point more than a genuine exchange of feelings. It developed so quickly and I just didn't find myself caring about their relationship at all. And honestly, I'm really angry about the climax of this book. It felt so unnecessary to (view spoiler)[publicly out Amanda like that and then have her be sexually assaulted?? Why did that have to be the narrative climax of the book? Why couldn't it have been something less traumatizing and public and fucked up? (hide spoiler)]

So I feel like this was a story that needs to be told - a trans girl starting over at a new school and wondering if not telling people she's trans is in some way lying or if she's simply living her truth and the details don't matter. But I'm not sure how I feel about the way this particular story was told.

I will say I loved the author's note at the end, explaining why she choose to portray Amanda's transness the way she did and that Amanda's experience is by no means universal. I definitely understand why Russo choose to use the easiest to swallow narrative as a foray into telling trans stories and I respect her reasoning and her decision.

I guess I think I'm at the point in exploring my own gender where I don't want to read stories where the character has always been sure; I want to see more stories where the character is confused as hell and trying to figure out the difference between identity and expression and how important that difference is to them and how their sexuality does or doesn't affect the way they think about their gender. So my mixed feelings might be more about the mental place I'm in rather than the book itself.

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Not Your Villain, C.B. Lee

Not Your Villain by C.B. Lee
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I spent the first few chapters of this book being hella confused before I was able to square away the timelines of this book and its predecessor. It was honestly really disappointing to realize that the full first third of this book was just retelling the events of Not Your Sidekick. I definitely didn't feel like Bells's viewpoint added enough extra to our understanding of what happened in Sidekick to justify putting so much time into retelling it. That entire first third could have been cut and more time could have been put into Bells's family's illegal farming and the methods of resistance that his family has been practicing for decades already and how that informs the way Bells and his friends form their new resistance efforts. I feel like Lee really dropped the ball there and it made the entire reading experience kind of underwhelming.

I still love the characters of this series and I'll definitely continue it (esp since the next book is from Emma's POV and we're gonna get a lot of questioning aroace content which I am SO HERE FOR) but this installment just didn't do a ton for me. Which was unfortunate.

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I Wish You All the Best, Mason Deaver

When Ben De Backer comes out to their parents as nonbinary, they're thrown out of their house and forced to move in with their estranged older sister, Hannah, and her husband, Thomas, whom Ben has never even met. Struggling with an anxiety disorder compounded by their parents' rejection, they come out only to Hannah, Thomas, and their therapist and try to keep a low profile in a new school.

But Ben's attempts to survive the last half of senior year unnoticed are thwarted when Nathan Allan, a funny and charismatic student, decides to take Ben under his wing. As Ben and Nathan's friendship grows, their feelings for each other begin to change, and what started as a disastrous turn of events looks like it might just be a chance to start a happier new life.

At turns heartbreaking and joyous, I Wish You All the Best is both a celebration of life, friendship, and love, and a shining example of hope in the face of adversity.

This book was so good. I found myself crying alongside Ben, rooting for them to find a safe place to land and good people to support them as they figured out how to handle being kicked out by their parents following their coming out. I found myself cheering as they grew more comfortable at their sister's house and at school, making friends and losing themselves in their artwork. This was a hard book in so many ways, because Ben's journey was definitely not easy, but it was satisfying as well, to see them move beyond their parents' bullshit and figure out their own place in the world. Everyone should go and pick this book up immediately.

The Prince and the Dressmaker, Jen Wang

Paris, at the dawn of the modern age:

Prince Sebastian is looking for a bride―or rather, his parents are looking for one for him. Sebastian is too busy hiding his secret life from everyone. At night he puts on daring dresses and takes Paris by storm as the fabulous Lady Crystallia―the hottest fashion icon in the world capital of fashion!

Sebastian’s secret weapon (and best friend) is the brilliant dressmaker Frances―one of only two people who know the truth: sometimes this boy wears dresses. But Frances dreams of greatness, and being someone’s secret weapon means being a secret. Forever. How long can Frances defer her dreams to protect a friend? Jen Wang weaves an exuberantly romantic tale of identity, young love, art, and family. A fairy tale for any age, The Prince and the Dressmaker will steal your heart.

I loved this! The art was gorgeous, the clothing as amazing, the characters were magnificent and the story was so so sweet. Wang portrayed emotion so well, which definitely heightened the reading experience. I honestly can't recommend this graphic novel enough.